When we are stressed, anxious and scared, hearing someone suggest we slow down, breathe, or just STOP what we’re doing for a minute feels … threatening. Impossible.
It is amazing (and even comical, if we can step away from ourselves for a second to see what is really going on) how we really feel like something terrible is going to happen if we let go of whatever is DRIVING us forward or keeping us stuck in a rut with our wheels spinning.
Pausing for a minute to take a step back, breathe, and regroup from a more detached, objective perspective is scary. Not only do we have to summon the courage to interrupt (and possibly lose) the momentum we think is necessary to make progress towards the solution or obtaining what we want, there’s a good chance we’ll be faced with reality: the reality that what we are doing isn’t working.
The reality is we are NOT going to get everything done that “needs” to get done, no matter how hard we drive ourselves.The reality is we are unhappy and afraid, and what we are so afraid of pushing pause on for just one minute is NOT going to lift us out of suffering, no matter how long we indulge in it or how emergent it might feel. The real problem goes unsolved, while the solution may be found in one. single. scary. minute.
Practice. One minute at a time. Checking in when you feel wound up or stuck in a loop or like you must push through whatever-it-is. Practice getting comfortable with stepping back for a minute and seeing your situation as it really is. Yourself as you are. Your current “emergency” that resists being put on hold for a minute to breathe or pee or take a drink of water. How important is it? Is what you’re doing working? What is the “real” problem and is what you’re afraid to step away from a truly promising solution? Or is the best solution right now within this one scary minute, to give yourself a hug and become aware that your amazing priceless heart is beating for you, as it does day and night. You are alive.